I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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