it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
