help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
