So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
