It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
