It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
