i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
