Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
