Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
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