Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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