I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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