are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize