dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
