that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
