Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Non-Jews are for practice
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
