Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
She's like a pop up book from hell.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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