I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
