i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
