I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Two words: nipple clamps
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