She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize
