I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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