i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
