I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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