...so i touched it.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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