We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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