I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
