Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
