so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
