just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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