I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
