I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
