Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
