Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
MIDGETS
????
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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