We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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