He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
