she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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