I'm jealous of your bromance
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
