I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize