Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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