Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I have tasted many bathrooms
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
