Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
