therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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