I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
