He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
