i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
We named our party play list daddy issues
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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