I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
