no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
