Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
