Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
