Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
